Right... at this rate, "a year" will be over in no time at all.
[a beat.]
Which is good, because I'm more than ready to teach whoever's behind this a lesson.
[me just sitting here waiting for a new memory to finish uploading on google drive... fucking lmao i did a new upload and it finished before the first one. anyway! there's that. she's not one to run from a fight when someone has made her angry. run toward one, on the other hand...]
...Hawkmoth. I think I told you about him before. [...] That wasn't my finest moment. A lot of stuff led up to that but... I'm still the one who went for it, even though I'm supposed to fight those things.
That's how he does things. He... talks to you. Gets in your head. The butterflies are attracted to people who are really angry, or sad, or jealous, or... any kind of negative emotion, really, and once they've got you, he convinces you that there's no other way except to do what he wants in exchange for the power you need to deal with whatever upset you.
[she sighs.]
I was already convinced of that. Ladybug and I didn't really get along very well, even though we were supposed to work together, and that day she told me she didn't need someone like me on her team. She... [her hand curls around her necklace.] ...she took my necklace. Even though it was passed down to me from my grandmother - my family's always been the one to use it. But she's the leader of the team, so she said she gets to make the call on who can and can't use them. Normally, I would have tried to fight back myself, with it, but it's the necklace that gave me powers. So, when I saw that butterfly, I thought... this is my chance.
...she ended up freeing me from Hawkmoth and we made up. She gave it back, and she even apologized for taking it, but...
I was so mad. It wasn't even just that it was my necklace, it was... It was left to me by my grandmother. Even if it wasn't magical, it's not the sort of thing that can just be replaced.
[she sighs!]
...and even ignoring that, it... the way she told me to leave the team just made me feel worthless. But... I still shouldn't have done it that way. Every time I remember it happened, I remember that I have to do better than I did that day.
They are. It was - it was that she took my grandmother's gift, and what she said, and how it made me feel, and...
[she sighs again and finally stops gripping her necklace so tightly. it settles back down against her skin.]
...I do want to change. I definitely won't let something like that get the better of me again. [...] I'm going to be worthy of the things that were left to me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[
but the part of her that's still salty about getting hit by a car during execution is smiling a little. luckily(?), that's being hidden by her hands.]
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[ Lila do not emulate this man. ]
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Okay... so we'll make them pay for what they did to us by ripping their limbs off!
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[ this is the worst thing I have ever done ]
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[she sees absolutely nothing wrong with this]
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Just need to find 'em.
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Surely they can't stay hidden for too long?
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Probably gonna show up before the end.
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Oh - because of how quickly the seasons seem to be passing...?
[fall did only seem to last two weeks, after all... and now it's the second week of winter...]
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[a beat.]
Which is good, because I'm more than ready to teach whoever's behind this a lesson.
[me just sitting here waiting for a new memory to finish uploading on google drive... fucking lmao i did a new upload and it finished before the first one. anyway! there's that. she's not one to run from a fight when someone has made her angry. run toward one, on the other hand...]
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... Who was that guy?
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lila looks down, fiddling with her necklace.]
...Hawkmoth. I think I told you about him before. [...] That wasn't my finest moment. A lot of stuff led up to that but... I'm still the one who went for it, even though I'm supposed to fight those things.
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[He does not even know how to explain what he saw there. "Like that"? "Willing to chat"?]
What lead up t' it?
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[she sighs.]
I was already convinced of that. Ladybug and I didn't really get along very well, even though we were supposed to work together, and that day she told me she didn't need someone like me on her team. She... [her hand curls around her necklace.] ...she took my necklace. Even though it was passed down to me from my grandmother - my family's always been the one to use it. But she's the leader of the team, so she said she gets to make the call on who can and can't use them. Normally, I would have tried to fight back myself, with it, but it's the necklace that gave me powers. So, when I saw that butterfly, I thought... this is my chance.
...she ended up freeing me from Hawkmoth and we made up. She gave it back, and she even apologized for taking it, but...
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1. raised in a cult
2. a mess because of other reasons.]
I'd be fuckin' pissed if somebody took my shit.
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[she sighs!]
...and even ignoring that, it... the way she told me to leave the team just made me feel worthless. But... I still shouldn't have done it that way. Every time I remember it happened, I remember that I have to do better than I did that day.
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You shouldn't ignore that t' begin with. The things that people gift you are important. Feelings are wrapped up in gifts.
Y'know? Long as ya wanna change, there's always time.
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[she sighs again and finally stops gripping her necklace so tightly. it settles back down against her skin.]
...I do want to change. I definitely won't let something like that get the better of me again. [...] I'm going to be worthy of the things that were left to me.
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